To kick off our Happy Waitress page, Larry and I could not
have found a better waitress to interview (or waiter for that matter). Andi was a great person to talk with, a wonderful waitress and made a hell of a cup of coffee. She also seemed to love
being asked for by name when being seated so keep that tip in mind if you hit the Meadowlands Diner.
LARRY: How many year have you been a waitress?
WAITRESS: Since 1980, I have been a waitress and bartender
LARRY: How old are you?
LARRY: What is your favorite dish at a diner?
WAITRESS: How the hell would I know? Jeez! Do you know how much we have on our menu? I like the alfredo... if chris makes it.
LARRY: How long has this diner been around for?
WAITRESS: A lot of years. I've only been here for six.
LARRY: What is the biggest tip you ever got?
WAITRESS: (thinking) Sixty dollars.
DAVE: Sixty Dollars!? How many people were at that table?
WAITRESS: Seven. They were nice, I was good.
LARRY: We're nice too, but... SIXTY DOLLARS?
WAITRESS: (laughing) Now
this is the diner you are talking about right? Because I got a bigger tip bar tending
DAVE: Please tell us the story.
WAITRESS: I had a man that used to come in every so often and every time he would come in I would wait on him and he would give me $100.
DAVE: Wow! What did he do for a living?
WAITRESS: You're asking me? I didn't care. I haven't the slightest idea.
DAVE: Tell us about the worst customer you ever had.
WAITRESS: (blank stare)
LARRY: Or the worst day.
DAVE: (joking) its happening right now isn't it.
WAITRESS: (laughing) I had this guy come in and he ordered a milkshake. So I bring it to him and he said 'Where is the milkshake glass' So I said "What are you talking about milkshake glass? We put it in a tin
, we put it in a glass, and thats it." "I *want* it in a milkshake glass!"
DAVE: One of those silver cups?
WAITRESS: No, one of those fountain glasses. Well we don't have them here. He was so upset he threw it. He made a complete mess all over the place.
LARRY: wow, I guess he didn't tip.
DAVE: He threw it? What flavor was it?
LARRY: Thats kinda funny. i envisioned strawberry.
WAITRESS: We threw him out. Oh wait then there was one time, I was all by myself here, no other waitresses and 45 gypsies came in.
WAITRESS: And I did my best, I was all by myself, but then they destroyed the place. We had to get the cops.
DAVE: what do you mean?
WAITRESS: They destroyed the place. They started taking things. It was only one person for 45 people. I told them "We'll do our best" and I was getting the food out, really doing quite well, but I just wasn't fast en
ough. And they started getting unruly. And then they started taking things on their own. then they spread mashed potatoes and gravy all over the table. Then they threw everything all over the floor. they made a shambles of this place. We thought there was
going to be a fight. There was a hundred and forty dollar check and they just got up and left.
LARRY: They didn't pay the check?
WAITRESS: Nope. The cops went and got them. They found one guy and brought him back. He paid the check and left twenty bucks.
DAVE: Besides your best tip would you also consider that your best customer?
WAITRESS: No, my best customer is
someone who comes in on a regular basis. My best customer is a guy who
comes in here late at night...he sits...he has breakfast...he gives me forty dollars. If he just has a cup of
coffee he gives me ten dollars. If he has breakfast it is usually 20 but if he has dinner it is usually 40 dollars.
DAVE: do you know what he does?
LARRY: He's probably like a billionaire.
LARRY: Does he come in every day?
WAITRESS: I'm not really sure.
LARRY: What got you to become a waitress and what got you to stay a waitress...all these years?
DAVE: 6! No, 10. ummm...
WAITRESS: Since 1980...money. I
got divorced and I wanted to live in the kinda thing I was accustomed
to...so I worked a day job and I worked bartending and waitressing at night and then when I got laid off 8 years l
ater from my day job I said "to hell with this." I make more money here then there....so, money. I like this better than an office job any day. I get to socialize, I get to...shit...this is excellent. It's not an easy job but I like it.
LARRY: What's the hardest thing about this job...the people?
LARRY: The hardest part is also the people?
LARRY: What's the easiest part?
DAVE: How many cups of coffee do you run through a shift?
WAITRESS: 20,000...people drink
coffee like there is no tomorrow. Are you kidding me? Coffee is our
biggest thing. If we run out of coffee we close the doors.
LARRY: If there is one food on this menu that you wouldn't eat, what is it and why?
WAITRESS: Corn beef hash. I don't like it here in particular.
LARRY: Have you ever served anyone famous?
WAITRESS: No. Witney was here...that asshole.
LARRY: Oh, Governor Whitman.
WAITRESS: I don't like her...she's a jerk.
DAVE: I don't like her either.
LARRY: OK. So cancel the question about Christie Whitman. (all laugh) Is this your temporary career or do you have plans?
WAITRESS: This is it. This is what I like to do. I get to socialize, I get to do what I want, I get to be myself. You get 9 to 5. This is good. I don't have to sit down all the time...you know...
DAVE: One thing that Larry and I noticed is that we like to come to this diner because we find the waitresses and waiters here to be very sociable.
LARRY: ..in general.
DAVE: Is there some reason for the atmosphere?
WAITRESS: Management lets you be yourself.
WAITRESS: If I want to sing I'll sing.
LARRY: Could you sing for us?
WAITRESS: No. We make money by our personality and I make good money because of my personallity...and my service. I'm very good service. They let you do what you do. They don't horde over you...don't look over y
our shoulder...nothing. Some other diners are very...stiff.
DAVE: Which other diner were we over at the other day...very stiff.
LARRY: The uhhh....the *********.
WAITRESS: (laughing) I don't eat there. The service stinks.
LARRY: Those pads that you write all the orders down on...those are chocolate right?....OK! I'll take that as a no!
LARRY: What kind of advise can you give to someone who is aspiring to be a waitress.
WAITRESS: If you don't like it don't do it. You got to like it at least 75%. I love this job.
LARRY: One more question...will you take your clothes off for us?
WAITRESS: What did I tell you before?